Folsom Prison Blues - As Sung By a 5yr Old

If you take Suri Cruise - then dye her hair blond, give her a guitar and turn her into a boy - you'd have Wesley here singing Johnny Cash's song 'Folsom Prison Blues'!

Just wait for him to get to the 'I shot a man in Weno just to watch him diiiiie' part! Adorable.

Cheers, Vampires!

It's no secret I love HBOs True Blood - have you been watching this season?! Holy Erik and LaFayette plotlines, thank you writers. So you can imagine my delight when I heard show creator, Alan Ball, announce at Comic Con that they've made a real 4pack of the TruBlood vampire beverage of choice.

Ball even 'joked that the drink was a mixture of 'wine, vodka, Vicodin, Viagra and Ecstasy' and that it was 'completely illegal.'" HEYOOOOOOO! Don't worry, it's just soda.

They even made up a drink menu for it:

Drink Menu:
The Fangbanger - Tru Blood, Vodka
Death on the Beach - Tru Blood, Peach Schnapps, Pineapple Juice, Vodka
Plasmapolitan - Tru Blood, Citron, Cointreau, Fresh Lime Juice

Let me just say, I think it's no coincidence that this gem of a drink comes out on my birthday (you can go pre-order it here). Just sayin...

The Daily Awe

I don't particularly care for rodents of any kind, but these lil baby otters are oh so adorable. I'll take one, please. A few more pics here.

The Daily Ew

Madonna, step away from the gym. This is not a good look on anyone.

Alice in Wonderland Trailer

This movie looks so incredible/creepy/pretty/tripped out/glorious that I almost want it to be March 2010 (release date) already! Tim Burton, Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter can really do no wrong in my eyes - Edward Scissorhands was hands down, my favorite movie growing up and I've looked forward to every Burton/Depp collaboration ever since.

The highly anticipated trailer for Burton's Alice in Wonderland premiered yesterday on IGN. The only problem is that Mr. Burton was supposed to premiere it at Comic Con today - whoops - someone leaked it a bit early.

Of course the fine folks at Disney freaked the F out and had the trailer pulled from YouTube and IGN. The only trailer I found left on the internet to share with you is at MSN - the quality is poor - but it'll do for now!

via Mashable

Nerd Alert!

This is Trent from Punchy

Trent is an Aussie dreamboat!

And I think he likes drugs, but it's hard to say. The guys who shot this found him in a train station and paid him $20 for an interview. Enjoy!

J-Stache!! and Hall & Oates!!

J-Stache - Official Trailer - watch more funny videos

Meet J Stache! He is Mr. Oates' mustache - as in John Oates, of Hall & Oates fame, the King of rock n soul! J Stache is a shit talking, prostitute loving, coke snorting, homeless wandering mustache. And my work premiered his new cartoon trailer on Funny orDie.com.

Amazing, no? And (shameless plug) follow J-Stache on Facebook for some wise words of wisdom. He's got a few gems up his sleeve, as you can read.

Dial 911 for Math Homework Problems

I hate math. And apparently this little 4 yr. old boy does too, because he called 911 to get help with his math homework. His mom flips her shit at the end of the recording when she finds out what he's doing, so wait for it!

Quote

Operator: 911 emergencies.
Boy: Yeah I need some help.
Operator: What’s the matter?
Boy: With my math.
Operator: With your mouth?
Boy: No with my math. I have to do... More »

Operator: 911 emergencies.
Boy: Yeah I need some help.
Operator: What’s the matter?
Boy: With my math.
Operator: With your mouth?
Boy: No with my math. I have to do it. Will you help me?
Operator: Sure. Where do you live?
Boy: No with my math.
Operator: Yeah I know. Where do you live though?
Boy: No, I want you to talk to me on the phone.
Operator: No I can’t do that. I can send someone else to help you.
Boy: Okay.
Operator: What kind of math do you have that you need help with?
Boy: I have take aways.
Operator: Oh you have to do the take aways.
Boy: Yeah.
Operator: Alright, what’s the problem?
Boy: Um, you have to help me with my math.
Operator: Okay. Tell me what the math is.
Boy: Okay. 16 take away 8 is what?
Operator: You tell me. How much do you think it is?
Boy: I don’t know, 1.
Operator: No. How old are you?
Boy: I’m only 4.
Operator: 4!
Boy: Yeah.
Operator: What’s another problem, that was a tough one.
Boy: Um, oh here’s one. 5 take away 5.
Operator: 5 take away 5 and how much do you think that is?
Boy: 5.
Woman: Johnny what do you think you’re doing?!
Boy: The policeman is helping me with my math.
Woman: What did I tell you about going on the phone?
Operator: It’s the mother…
Boy: You said if I need help to call somebody.
Woman: I didn’t mean the police.

via here

Found on a Telephone Pole

Ladies, any takers?

via Boing Boing

The Wall Street Journal Says Boys Wear Skinny Jeans! Who knew!

BREAKING NEWS: Holy shit! The WSJ have just discovered a brand new trend: boys wear skinny jeans!

That video is amazing, if not for all the dummys they interviewed ("I ripped my skinny jeans at a Vampire Weekend show" and "I've been wearing skinny jeans my entire life"), but for the fact that the reporter doesn't even leave the corner of the Bedford L stop. It's like he's a war zone reporter - keep close guys, we don't want to wander too far from the safety of the train, we're in Brooklyn now. You might get mugged, or even worse, offered cocaine! - thanks Apex!

In all seriousness, don't they have better things to report on than boys in skinny jeans? They have an entire article on it!

via Free Williamsburg

You Can Blow With This or You Can Blow With That!

Yet another reason to love Christopher Walken! YouTube is being cranky and won't let me upload the video, but GO HERE to watch Mr. Walken dance in Fatboy Slim's video for 'Weapon of Choice'. The mans got moves.

Sexy Hot Tan!

Don't forget to put this on this weekend!

And yes, it's actually real. Will Ferrell teamed up with the Cancer for College charity to sell these sexy lotions, with 100% of the proceeds going towards the charity, which gives scholarships to cancer patients.

I <3 you Will Ferrell...

Awkward Family Photos

Oh no. No no no. What crack pipe are these parents smoking?! This picture is just not right. I hope the baby got possessed by the devil*, who then forced the parents to lose all sorts of self respect and pride in order to dress the entire family like this. That is the only reasonable excuse for this picture.



Plain Jane Creepsters.

Awkward Family Photos

*and of course I don't really hope the baby was possessed by Satan, but you get my point.

Brazilian Child Preachers.

Managed by their parents, on tour 365 days a year, and charging $900 for a two-hour sermon, child preachers are big business in Brazil. Each event is a finely tuned marketing maneuver promoted with posters, magazine coverage, and radio ads. If you want one of these kid wonders to visit your parish, you’ll also have to fork over a down payment on a minimum of 150 DVDs (around $750). -Vice

Vice Mag recently chatted with 3 of Brazil's most popular little Catholic prophets - Ana Carolina Lucena Dias (14), Matheus Moraes (11) and Alex Silva (15) - to see what life's really like for them (pray, preach, pray, sermon, pray, travel and repeat). The article sheds some light on the life these kids lead and how unwaivering they seem to be in their devotion to serving God and the people. Matheus has been preaching sermons since age 6 and Alex is the only one who seems remotely well-rounded because he mentions he likes soccer - the other kids talk only of god and their parents.

I can't help but feel sad for these kids -of course they're going to believe what their parents tell them. Everyone does when you're that young. But these fanatic religious parents are telling their kids stories of being born as prophets, building them up and touting them as such across the country to make quick and easy money. I mean, come on, preacher Alex gets a new suit for every sermon he does!

I would very much like to catch up with these same kids in 10 years to see what they're like and if they still feel the same.

Read the whole article here.

Spoiler Alert : Britney Spears REALLY Can't Sing (as if you didn't already know)!

I get why Britney doesn't sing live, I do - she can't with all the choreography and running around she does. Which is fine because people don't go see her in concert to see a good singer, they go to see a big performance.

But this? Really? Oh, it's bad.

Breakfast at Sulimay's

I don't know how in the world this slipped by me, but I finally caught my first episode of Breakfast at Sulimay's and am officially hooked! The premise of the youtube series are 3 elderly people, er, critics - Bill, Ann and Joe - reviewing current 'hip' music. It's hilarious. And sweet. Old people are so cute.

Here's one where they review a Yo La Tengo song, which they all unanimously like. Ann, looking like a crazy bag lady, goes so far as to call it 'a humping song' and instructs everyone to 'lick their lips'. And Joe is adorably serious about his job as a critic.


Here they review Beirut's 'My Night With A Prostitute in Marseille'. Anne says, 'How boring! That is not a prostitute song, I would know.' And Joe thinks the song is 'after dinner music, when you're throwing up.'** Then they review Sepultura, which Bill likes and Ann headbangs along too. Sounds amazing, no?


**Of course, if you know me, you know I love Beirut and have to disagree with the critics' opinions of him, no matter how cute and old they may be. And because I can, here's a video for Nantes, a song I'm quite enamored with. And if you've got time to kill, go watch this version too!

Because We Can't Have Drive-In Movies...

Summer movies in the park start tonight at McCarren. Reality Bites. Dusk. See you there!

My Dream House Belongs to Max Azria

These photos are from a recent spread Harpers Bazaar did on Max and Lubov Azria's Los Angeles home.

This house is amazing, I would absolutely move into this place in a heartbeat if I could. I love the playful, eclectic look and feel of the entire house - the play of black and white, bold colors and graphic prints. Ahhhh, I want!

And how incredible is that crystal chandelier spilling into the solid wood table in the first picture? I think I'm going to redecorate my house now. Goodbye!

via Harpers Bazaar (more pics)

Carefree Summer

I love this photo by Sara Norris. All I can think of while looking at it is 'bubble gum gritty', whatever that means.

And because it's finally beginning to feel like summer, now that it's July (ironically enough, it just started to rain as I typed that), here are a few more summer themed shots...





via Vintage Indie

Crazy Lady, Center Stage

A lobster/crawfish shirt and a Native American headdress made of paper hands with eyes on them. Is there anything Karen O can't pull off?

via The Vogue Blog

Daily Video - Sour's 'Hibi no Neiro'

neat music video = understatement.

via BOOOOOOOM

Website of the Day

WhyTheFuckDoYouHaveAKid.com - Hilarious and sad. This site, like A&E's Intervention, make me feel pretty good about my life!








About the letter above : “This magnificent letter was put into all the mailboxes of my friend’s building. It is also proudly on display on the bulletin board.”

Total Eclipse of the Heart : Literal Video Version

Oh god, I love music videos from the 80s. And this video has Bonnie Tyler looking like a hot tranny mess. Winner.

Clearly the people who dubbed over this video can't really sing, but that's not the point. It's just silly.

Fallen Princesses

Princess Jasmine


Snow White

"These works place Fairy Tale characters in modern day scenarios. In all of the images the Princess is placed in an environment that articulates her conflict. The ‘…happily ever after’ is replaced with a realistic outcome and addresses current issues… Disney’s perfect Princesses [are] juxtaposed with real issues that were affecting women around me, such as illness, addiction and self-image issues." - photographer Dina Goldstein

See the rest of this interesting series here.